73% of people: “It’s not good enough”

Recently, I’ve been presenting workshops about how to show your work and build a meaningful digital presence at various universities and conservatories. 

At the top of the presentation, I survey participants about thoughts that come up for them when they think about building a digital presence. 

So far, 73% of people (out of roughly 100) have checked this box: 

✅ “I don’t sound good enough or the work isn’t good enough to start.” 

Oh my…! 

I was expecting that number to be high… but that is REALLY high. 

This thought plagues so many of us (and it’s not just musicians contemplating putting their playing online). 

Maybe for you it’s not speaking up in class or meetings because you don’t think your contribution is “good enough”. Or it’s not applying to a different job because you don’t think you’re “qualified”. Or it’s not telling someone about an idea you have that is meaningful to you because you think it’s “dumb”. 

How do we grapple with the delicate balance between wanting to give our best to the world and never doing it because we feel like it’s not good enough?

I’ve certainly struggled with this immensely. 

And, there are a few things that have helped me. Maybe they can help you, too: 

1 – Define "good enough" 

For me, if something is a) the best I can do for now despite any gap I may have between my taste and ability or b) I know it may have a positive impact on those I am serving, then it's good enough. This is something you'll have to define for yourself, although I would warn you that often the "voice of the oppressor" (as Anne Lamott writes about) will hold you down your entire life and keep telling you you can do better.

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​2 – Shift the focus

You can chase followers and likes and validation, or, you can chase telling your story, how you want to help others, and expressing what you care about. And I always say this: if you learn how to talk about what you care about, I think that's a gigantic win, even if no one else ever sees the thing.

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​3 – Stop trying to be an “expert”

There are a whole lot of “experts'' online, as we all know. I’ve found a lot of people think they need to present as an expert and deliver brilliant rules for living to be of value to others. That is certainly not true. Sharing your experience and story, letting others deduce what is meaningful to them about what you shared, is often very impactful. 

4 – Understand the difference between good enough and not great

Of course there are things we probably shouldn’t put out into the world… If you have a 15 second clip of yourself playing and there are 15 wrong notes in it, maybe skip it. But is that REALLY what you’re telling yourself isn’t good enough? Or is it the 15 second clip with one pitch-questionable note that you’re giving up on? I like to remember this image when I’m grappling with if something is truly “terrible” or if it’s good enough: 

So, it’s your turn.

​Are you holding back on starting a digital presence, or speaking up in a meeting, or telling someone about an idea because you don’t think it’s “good enough”? 

Perhaps it’s time to reevaluate. 

ps: If you haven't read any Anne Lamott, I highly recommend Bird by Bird. My 8th grade english teacher, Ms. Rogers, gifted me this book upon graduation and I still reference that copy when I'm feeling like I'm just not cutting it.